I received divorce papers and do not know what to do next. What questions should I ask at the first consultation?

Start with the served process

Open the appointment with the complete papers and these questions:

1. What exactly was served, is the set complete and which court issued it?
2. What service fact and current rule control the response instruction?
3. What is the calculated date, and how much safety margin should we keep?
4. Has default, set-down, a later pleading or an order already been recorded?
5. If the court file or service position is uncertain, who will check it and by when?

Request a written answer tied to your summons, not a generic timeframe. Ask whether the lawyer is giving advice only or has accepted responsibility to draft, sign, file, deliver and monitor the first response.

Ask what the first response must accomplish

The notice of intention to defend is not normally the complete defence. Ask:

• Which form or document is required now?
• Who signs it and where must it be filed and delivered?
• What address will be used for later service?
• What court and delivery proof will we retain?
• What pleading, disclosure or conference comes next?

If an objection about jurisdiction, service or another irregularity may exist, ask how it should be preserved. A procedural concern should be assessed promptly, not used as a reason to do nothing.

Test every allegation and requested order

Use an allegation-and-relief table during the consultation. Ask which statements can be admitted, denied, partly admitted or left for further information. Then ask what evidence is required for each position.

Separate agreement that the marriage has broken down from disputes about property, maintenance, children, pensions or legal costs. Avoid demanding a guaranteed outcome; ask what result is supportable on the current facts and which assumptions remain unresolved.

Identify urgent or parallel problems

Ask whether safety, domestic violence, child care or contact, housing, essential support, legal costs, evidence loss or asset dissipation requires a separate step. For every urgent concern, ask:

• What remedy is actually available?
• What facts must be proved?
• What record should be preserved now?
• Can the issue wait for the ordinary divorce timetable?
• Who will own the urgent application or referral?

Where direct contact is unsafe or restricted by an order, ask for the authorised communication channel and immediate protection route.

Clarify children and the Family Advocate

For each child, ask what information the court will need about care, contact, guardianship, schooling, health, support and stability. Discuss how the child's privacy and voice will be protected and whether any proposed change requires consent, an inquiry or a court order.

Ask whether the Office of the Family Advocate should be involved now, what issue it will address and which documents are required. Confirm that the office is neutral and child-focused; it is not your personal lawyer and does not decide the spouses' financial dispute.

Confirm the financial framework

Ask which marriage or union is legally relevant and which matrimonial-property regime applies. The lawyer should check the marriage certificate, antenuptial contract and any customary, civil-union or foreign-law facts rather than relying on assumptions.

Then work through income, expenses, assets, debts, companies, trusts, loan accounts and pension interests. Useful questions include:

• Which disclosure do we already have, and what is missing?
• Which records can I lawfully collect myself?
• What formal disclosure or preservation process may be needed?
• Do we need a valuation, tax input or fund-specific pension review?
• Which creditor, lender, fund, conveyancer or other third party must act before a term can be implemented?

Ask about settlement without losing the court response

Find out which issues are ready for settlement, which need disclosure and which may require adjudication. Ask how offers will be authorised, labelled, recorded and protected from accidental acceptance.

If a draft already exists, ask whether it is complete, interim, conditional or full and final. Confirm the effect of every waiver, pension term, property transfer, maintenance clause, parenting term and costs provision before signing. A settlement discussion does not automatically extend a court step.

Define communication and evidence controls

Ask what you should stop saying, signing, paying, moving, deleting or posting while the response is prepared. Confirm a secure channel for legal advice and sensitive records. Discuss how necessary messages about children, support or logistics should be framed and preserved.

Identify evidence that could disappear, including originals, metadata, account statements and witness details. Ask for lawful preservation steps; do not impersonate another person or enter private accounts without authority.

Fix the mandate, team and cost boundary

Ask which work the lawyer will handle: the initial response, defended proceedings, urgent relief, child issues, financial disclosure, settlement, trial or implementation. Record exclusions and handoffs. Name the person monitoring the chosen service address.

Request the fee basis for the consultation, attorney time, advocate or counsel, sheriff, experts, valuation, mediation and court work. Ask what deposit or trust arrangement applies, which work requires prior approval and when estimates will be refreshed.

The answer log to take home

Before leaving, record the next three checkpoints in this format:

Also request the document list, written mandate or non-engagement position and the next reporting date. Unassigned work is a risk.

Build your supporting file with the documents-to-prepare guide. Use the pre-advice conduct protocol for communication boundaries and the agreement review gate before accepting terms. The Divorce and Family Law directory helps locate relevant practitioners.

FAQs

Related Lexuno paths

Related articles